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Preventing a Custody Battle After your Divorce. |
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Preventing a custody battle after your divorce is
probably one of the most important things to think of. I recently
"celebrated" the six-year anniversary of my custody battle. I have learned vital lessons that I
would like to share with all parents. Divorce yourself emotionally
from your former spouse and mind your own business.
Children are not property and parents do not own them, therefore
they should not be fought over like property. The issue here is not custody,
It's loving the children while sharing parental and financial responsibility for their physical needs and maintaining open communication between the parents.
Don't file a custody suit out of bitterness or to get personal revenge or to avoid sharing parental responsibility,
by doing this you commit a crime against your children. Regardless
of how much you may despise your former spouse your children are a
part of them as well.
Preventing a custody battle after your
divorce includes communication with your former spouse, no matter
how much you dread it because your children will want to be sure
that they can approach any one of you for advice and help. Healthy divorced parents show courtesy and respect towards
on another, therefore their children internalize the message that they are respected. Through open dialogue with each other, parents teach their children to
be honest rather than sacrificing it to please one parent or blame
the other. |
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The moment parents stop blaming each other and start to look within, they take personal responsibility for their thoughts
and feelings. By doing this their issues are healed and their children are spared
a great deal of pain.
As a parent, you need to look at the source of your pain. It is not with your former spouse,
but it's within you! Look closely at the areas you fervently guard,
if you don't want open communication, do it anyway for the sake
of your children.
If you are one of those who don't want to pay child support
- pay it anyway, your children have the tight to be raised with the financial resources of both parents
and therefore deserve the best life they can possibly have.
Laws have changed in the last thirty-five years or so with
regards to child support enforcement laws and custody regulations.
The courts cannot enforce healthy, open communication between the parents
and they cannot impose on us the one thing that will make all the difference
which comes from the inside - love. Love and heal your self, love and honor your children
then and only then will you and your children know peace.
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TODAY'S NEWS:
The Internet, texting, cell phones and GPS devices have become crucial for divorce lawyers. Eight out of 10 of those attorneys say they're using those devices more and more these days to get the goods on errant spouses. One local woman tells CBS 2's Mike Parker how she nailed her straying husband.
Divorce is all about separating. But, it can be achieved more cheaply if done together.
An anti-divorce Facebook group which has already garnered the support of 1,500 members has been joined by Nationalist MPs Franco Debono and Edwin Vassallo.
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Try to focus on being the best parent to your child when you are with them. Never speak negatively about the other parent
or show the other parent disrespect or even cause the children to feel they should take sides
(Big NO-NO). Allow the children the right to express love to both
the parents. Be grateful for whatever the other parent contributes to the lives of your children,
seeing that they are both parent's children and stop seeking to get more
out of the situation. This is the best way to preventing a
custody battle after your divorce!
Spend your energy on
accepting and sharing parental responsibility with your spouse for the sake of your children, rather than
waging a war! your children will thrive emotionally, they
will bear less psychological scars and they will learn the gifts
of open dialogue.
Lastly, as divorced parents, do everything (we
mean everything) you can to create a pleasant atmosphere with your former spouse for
the sake of your children. This may be an unwilling sacrifice for you, but it is a gift for your children.
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